


Barry's Apology

by YesikaNicole



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Episode 8, F/M, Flash Versus Arrow, Mentions of Iris West, Mentions of Ronnie Raymond, Season 1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 14:00:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2735204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YesikaNicole/pseuds/YesikaNicole
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barry apologizes to Caitlin. Post- Flash vs. Arrow Episode. Season 1 episode 8. After the outburst in Star Labs, Barry comes back to apologize for what he said about Ronnie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Barry's Apology

She forgot how long she had been sitting at her computer, with the picture of Ronnie and her staring back.

 Those accusing words from Barry kept ringing in her ears.

  _“I’m not Ronnie, Caitlin.”_ No. He certainly was not.

  _“You have to stop treating me like I am.”_

 Those words had stung more than she liked to admit. A further reminder that Ronnie was gone. Like she needed any more reminders. Ronnie’s death was something she felt every day. They would have been married by now. They would have been happy.

 Having a purpose again was helping to ebb that empty hole Ronnie’s death had left in her. For the first time since the particle accelerator malfunction, she had felt a light ignite inside of her again. It was unexpected. She never thought she would feel genuine happiness again.

 Barry had helped. He was the first person who had made her smile since Ronnie’s death. Maybe that was why she was a bit overprotective of him. She could not fathom what would happen if he was gone from her life.

 Why did the thought of something happening to him make it feel like someone had sucked all of the air out of the room? She couldn’t lose him too.

 Too?

 Why had she said that to him? When had she _started_ worrying about him? When had she _started_ putting him on the same level as Ronnie? They were just friends. Ronnie was her fiancé. The whole thing made her feel uneasy. She certainly wasn’t replacing Ronnie. She had loved Ronnie with everything she was. Her love for him was burned deep into her heart. What she and Ronnie had was once in a lifetime.

 Right?

 After all, Barry was hopelessly and endlessly in love with Iris. He would never love anyone else like he loved Iris.

 Right?

 All of these thoughts were running around in circles in her head. She was leaned over the desk, head in her hands, when Barry flew in. He certainly was the last person she wanted to see right now. She didn’t even look up when she felt the air whip her hair around her face. She wouldn’t give him further evidence of how his words had hurt her. She just wanted to forget and move on.

 _________________________________________________________

Barry noticed her slumped posture over the desk immediately. Her long fingers entwined in her hair. His guilt was building and building. Why had he been so upset? Why did he go off on _her_ like that? He knew why he had been mad at everyone else. He hadn’t realized he was upset with her. He couldn’t even put his finger on _why_. After the rage effects were gone, he didn’t know how to apologize to Caitlin. He didn’t know how it would help.

 So he put it off.

 First he apologized to Oliver even though he knew Oliver would forgive him anyways. Oliver was not the type to give up on people. He was grateful he now fell under this umbrella.

 Then he had to apologize to Iris. Iris. The love of his life since he had figured out what love was. He knew she wouldn’t forgive the Flash so easily. But why couldn’t she SEE _him_? She always was noticing guys like Eddie, or Oliver. Special people. Strong, hulking guys. People like the Flash. He was beginning to think she would never see him as just Barry. A Barry she could love as more than a friend. She would always see him as more of a brother.

 Then there was Caitlin. Irritating. Genius. Geneticist. Caitlin. Infuriatingly protective over him in both of his identities.

 How do you apologize to your partner? Would she know how sorry he was? The look she had given him played in his mind over and over. He couldn’t shake it out of his head. He knew what she was dealing with after all. She lost the love of her life. He understood her. They understood each other. She couldn’t be with the person she loved most. He couldn’t be with the person he loved most. Why would he poke at that sensitive subject? Why did it bug him so much to be compared to Ronnie? She was just his friend after all. Ronnie was her fiancé. It just meant she cared about him.

 Right?

 _________________________________________________________

 She felt Barry staring at her. It annoyed her that he had been standing across the desk from her without uttering a single sound. She sighed and lifted her head.

 ”Why don’t you go home Barry?”

  _Please leave me alone._

 “I have some things I have to finish up.”

  _I can’t think straight with you looming over me._

 _________________________________________________________

 Barry looked down at the floor, unsure of his next move. He just wanted to make this better. He wanted her to smile again. He wanted to make her smile. If he couldn’t, could he really call himself her friend? Could she be his partner EVERY DAY if he couldn’t make this right? If he couldn’t step up and apologize for what he had said?

 He flashed out of the room.

 _________________________________________________________

 She didn’t know if she was relieved when he left or if she wished he had said something, but she let out the breath she had been holding in. Caitlin thought she should really start wearing her hair up, but she kind of liked the way it felt when Barry would speed past her. Like a breath of fresh air.

 She leaned back and was looking up at the ceiling when Barry materialized in the chair next to her. She jumped and grabbed the arms of her chair.

 “I thought you went home Barry!” She realized she was practically yelling.

 _________________________________________________________

“I went to get something.” He put a bottle of tequila on the table and two shot glasses that he took from the bar they had been to a few weeks before. He smiled to himself as he remembered how she had tried to figure out a way he could get even the smallest bit tipsy. He wished not everything was sped up.

 He poured two drinks. He hated that she couldn’t look at him. In this time they had been working together, they had become incredibly close. They had a bond over their inability to be with the ones they loved. They relied on each other as friends. As a team.

 He couldn’t imagine her not being in his life anymore. He lingered on her face. He loved that she always wore her hair down, even though she knew it would get messed up by his entrances and exits.

 She was already one of his closest friends. He took a deep breath through his teeth. He needed to just apologize.

 “About what I said to you, Caitlin - ”

 “Don’t worry about it, Barry. You were under Rainbow Raider’s influence.” She smirked at the name she gave to the meta-human. She was reaching for one of the shot glasses when Barry grabbed her hand. Startled, their eyes locked together.

 “It’s not okay. I am really sorry Caitlin. Sometimes I take advantage of the fact that I know you will always be here for me, that I forget I need to be here for you too.”

 “We’re a team Barry. A minor outburst won’t change that.”

 “I am still sorry and I shouldn’t have talked to you like that. What I said about Ronnie. It wasn’t okay.”

 Caitlin smiled sadly. She didn’t know what to say. She would forgive Barry, she knew she would. Now she couldn’t look at him without hearing his words. Unknowingly, he brought something to the surface and she didn’t know what exactly it was or how to deal with that variable.

 “I forgive you Barry.”

 Barry smiled broadly and handed her the shot glass.

 “Rainbow Raider, though? Did Cisco’s mind explode?” Barry asked after they took their drinks.

Caitlin laughed at the remembrance of Cisco proclaiming that she was no longer allowed to name the meta-humans.

 Barry immediately felt a weight lift off of him. They were going to be okay. He had made her laugh again. That was all that mattered in this moment. That Caitlin Snow was able to smile.

 “You realize this isn’t fair. Thanks to your super speed, you aren’t affected by alcohol at all.” She said as he poured them both another drink.

 “True, but I believe that you will solve that eventually, Doctor Snow.”

 


End file.
